Funny Every Time

There are a lot of things out there that make people laugh. There are fewer things that will make people laugh after the first time you watch it, and there are even fewer things that make people laugh every time they watch it. This classic news report from the 70's or 80's gets funnier every time I watch it. It's got a bit of everything, fantastically bad story telling puns, the "expert' that has no idea what he is doing, and an explosion that could have killed some one. Enjoy!



Leave a comment or link for the stuff that makes you laugh every time...

Back to the Ranch

I think this is a great little experiment that was done. I hope people enjoy.

http://whoiamisfreedom.blogspot.com/2009/03/joshua-bell-at-washington-dc-metro.html

Things are going really well right now. My first vacation in more than a year is just around the corner after my two week masters course finishes at the end of august. Will be back in the OC until mid-septeber and am stoked to go see as many live sporting events as I can including frootball, baseball, and soccer.

The Panama Ports Project

This is a short blurb I prepared on the selling points of our project. It is very slanted, but that is what they pay me to do.

The future pier will extend almost to the other shore line in the distance

Surface construction is complete in areas and the client has already made use of it. For perspective of the size look at the right hand side and you will see a white container box which is the size of a container carried on a rail car or semi-truck.

Since June 2006 the Louis Berger Group has provided consulting services to Panama Ports Company in Panama City. Using both Berger/ABAM and local office assets, LBG carried out the design and is in its second year of on-site construction management. LBG has been responsible for the oversight of all phases of the construction process including the dredged removal of over 3.1 million cubic meters of unsuitable materials, reclamation of over 2.8 million cubic meters of densified sand, and the preparation of the yard to receive containers with the full services of water, sanitation, and electricity for the berth cranes, reefer gantries, and the option to electrify all the RTGs in the yard. Two rivers have been diverted around the new container yard and loading berth, and a structure to link an existing berth to the newly reclaimed container yard.

By the scheduled completion of the project in 2011 over 100 acres of new useable yard space and an additional berth will be made available to Panama Ports providing capacity for more than 3-4 million Twenty (foot container box) Equivalent Units (TEU) annually which makes it one of the biggest ports on the western seaboard of the Americas. Once fully implemented, LBG’s design will provide greater port capacity in addition to optimizing traffic flow making it more efficient to travel between the port berths, the Panama Canal Railroad, container storage areas, and the surface road access points.

Political Over/Under

Okay all you ghosts and goblins. we are officially a hand full of days away from the election and in my free time here at work I have been a political junkie gathering information and looking at raw data of poles collected and posted on line. I really don't care about national poles, because that is not how the president is elected. Those of you who believe we live in a democracy need to go back to High School Government class and realize that we are voting in a Democratic Republic, even for President. It is called the Electoral College and despite popular belief in our nation we actually have 51 elections for President as opposed to just one.

That being said it should be important to analyze the political map in such a fashion. there are plenty of poles, and poles of poles and blah blah blah. Back in the 80's (I think) there were some major union strike with car manufacturers (I think) and the car companies successfully crushed the unions on strike by noting that the average person at their company was earning a hansom salary. This was true, but they also included EVERYONES salary including the CEO. If one were to have looked at the median salary of the company it would have been halved of the number that the companies were implying.

Taking this concept to heart and the sheer quantity of polling data available I have analyzed the results using a median analysis method since June when Hillary Clinton bowed out of the race. Based on the figures I have collected from http://www.usaelectionpolls.com/ the results are in and they are not pretty. According to my analysis Barrack Obama should win the election by more than 2 to 1. He will win all of the Kerry states from 2004. In addition to these states he will also win the following states that voted for Bush in 2004:

Colorado, Florida, Indiana, Iowa, Missouri, Nevada, New Mexico, North Carolina, North Dakota, Ohio, and Virginia.

Some easy calculator work shows the final result at Obama 378, McCain 160. I invite the three people that might read this post before the election to submit weather you think that Obama will end up with more or less electoral votes that 378. Everyone who gets it correct will get a virtual "treat" from my left over candy from Halloween.

Final Breakdown on Brazil:

Country of Origin: Argentina
Total time in country: 21 days
Music: The Samba! Move your feet as fast as you can! It doesn't really seem to matter if it is to the music or not.
People: Beautiful women might distract you from their boyfriends buying the next round with money from your pocket.
Transport: Buses are expensive, no movies AND NO A/C! What a bunch of crap.
Landscape: Green, lush, tropical paradise, quaint colonial areas, beautiful beaches. Yawn, seen it in other places too. The truly original place... Iguazu Falls
Food: My poorness was evident in my food choice in this country. I can tell you that bake ham and cheese rolls on every street corner get old quickly and it is really hard to find peanut butter.
Safety: Carnival had some obvious security issues as discussed, and the countryside is safe as in most countries, and in the big cities you just need to stay in the safe areas like any major city.
Gas prices: gas - 2.57 Reales/ gallon (5.49 USD/gallon), or the sugar cane ethanol for 3.62 USD/gallon.
Surprised by: How big the country is! Brazil is the next smallest country to the USA, and to think that we took a bus half way through it to get to Salvador, then turned around and went back a quarter of the way back to get to Rio, that is a lot of bus time
Final word: The unexpected gem! I had few expectations going into Brazil besides the pandemonium of Carnival. Carnival came through and so did all the other parts of the country. The countryside was beautiful, the beaches clean, and Rio vivacious. The Portuguese was funky for a couple of days but easy enough with the Spanish background, but this doesn't matter much as everyone there speaks body language.
Next stop: USA via Panama

Wrappin' It Up in Rio

After a week of chasing a bunch of girls through the streets of Salvador, and then getting chased back by several of them that turned out to not be girls; Carnival was over. This meant also that Dave and my traveling time together was done. We shared a special moment in the hostel as he left early one morning to go to Rio a couple of days before I went. There was a twinge of sadness in my voice when I asked him to not forget to turn out the light as he left. Dave wiped the sleep boogers out of his eyes, but it could have well be a tear as he grunt and closed the door. Jon was still dead to the world and said later that it took him a full week to recover from the chaos that was a week in Salvador. Some might say he never did!

Before I could run off to Rio I needed some good R and R from my 3 month and 3 week vacation. I took off to Lençois a nice little mountain town without any mountains to the west of Salvador. I ran into some Irish chaps who like all good Irishmen loved to drink. So we took to getting rid of our week long hangovers though the old Irish method of drinking more which seems to work well enough. Lençois had some fun hikes that we didn't do, some interesting geological formations that we didn't see, and some very pleasant natural hot springs that we didn't swim in. Like much of Brazil the tourism industry gets a little outrageous for the month before and after Carnival, and this being the end of my trip (read: strapped for cash) I was perfectly content to sit creek-side and enjoy a good book about cocaine smuggling.

After the batteries were charged for another go at a major party city we headed back towards Rio. The bus ride took us a few days with a stop at beach town where we enjoyed what most people enjoy at a good beach. A couple of days later we found ourselves in a street party in Rio. I asked some of the locals in my horrible Portuguese if this was still left over from the Carnival party that was now a week old. She laughed and said that this 10 sq block area was always full on a Tuesday night with the hipsters from Brazil and all over the world.

The famous beaches are also quite the sight to see, but like the other beaches around the world there is the sandy part and then there is the ocean part. Ipanema though reminded me of what one might see on Baywatch.

I was really impressed by the Christ Redeemer and the story he's always telling of the best fishing trip ever. It's location atop a rocky bulge in the middle of the city gives awesome presence even in the sprawling suburbs. From the top it is possible to see the Sugar Loaf as seen in the picture in this post, and the Maracana which is the Brazilian shrine to soccer. The Christ Redeemer's fishing trip gives it great presence in the entire city, but its placement in the modern 7 Wonders of the World I find a little cheeky. I was more impressed by the Statue of Liberty; something I alost skipped on my trip to New York but was astounded how impressed I was standing at it's feet. Ms. Liberty's construction was also more difficult and an achievement at the time, but I digress.

I made arrangement so that the last thing I did in country was go see a soccer game in the Maracana. It is the largest stadium in South America, officially holds 95,000 fans and has been reported to have held unofficially around 200,000 fans for a game back in the 1950's. As is the etiquette in all other South American countries the end zones are reserved for the general masses and where the large banners and flares go off. When goals were scored the look of exhilaration at one end was matched only by the dejected look from the opposing end of the stadium. With everyone wanting to sit in the worst seat to be a part of the best atmosphere, we walked into the stadium 3 minutes before the kick-off of the Semi-final match and sat 18 rows behind the teams at midfield, the best seats in the house!
The Irish lads and I tried to wander up into the crazy section, but my poor Portuguese and their non-existent Portuguese did not allow us to talk our way past security. It's amazing how the grass is always greener, and we were put off by our unsuccessful attempt to join the animated areas as we scuffeled back to our seats at midfield.

The game end 2-1 and was back and forth the entire way between to Rio clubs that were both well represented in the stadium. This definitely makes the list as a top three sporting events I've seen in person, and certainly one of the best venues in which to see nearly 100,000 people go crazy at the same time.

After the game I went straight out to the airport where I sat and waited for my red eye flight to Panama and eventually home. Brazil and Carnival did not disappoint as a good place to end a trip of this caliber. Check South America of the places to visit in the world. Next stop... SE Asia. I guess I'd better go get a job so that I can eventually pay for it.

The Job

So lots of people have asked what it is exactly that I do. To make a baseball reference, I am the utility player. I fill in for others and do all the jobs that no else has time or the patience to do. It's an interesting position because I get to sit in the high level meeting and listen to the people narrate the story of what is happening. In these weekly and monthly meeting I am the one that takes the notes and writes the story. I write the minutes to make my company look good, and then the three bosses edit them to make us look even better.

The basics of the job is construction management for THE major ports company in Panama. It is owned by the largest ports managing company (based in Hong Kong) in the world. As the Panama Canal expansion takes place this port is moving more containers than ever before with only more work on the way. We are building a large transfer station (read Parking Lot) for containers. We have taken a large swamp and are in the process of turning it into a concrete slab. There has been quite a bit of noticeable difference made even in just the past 4 months of my employment.


Picture taken 11 July 08 (looking south) of the area that was dredged and then filled with sand. The river on the left side has been moved to run its present path. Note also the dock construction along the right side of the picture.



Picture taken 15 August 08 (looking north). Notice shipping containers at bottom of screen stacked six high. We are building more storage so that the entire sand area will have capacity to store shipping boxes. Eventually the dock will be extended an additional 500 meters along the east side of the canal to where it will make land fall. It is about 50 m wide.



Picture taken 30 September 08. I estimate the the sand area to be about 18-20 football fields.